Ghouls
out for
Naseem
Sick Yanks guilty of a grave Halloween error
GOOD taste and Sky Television go together like malt whisky and Lucozade.
So I can't say I was surprised to see Prince Naseem Hamed filmed strolling through a mock graveyard on his way into the ring to fight Wayne McCullough for the world featherweight title (Sky Box Office, Saturday).
But discredit where it's due. This was the American TV network's gruesome idea, not Sky's.
Banshees wailed, witches cackled, mist clouds swirled round Hamed's knees.
A Phantom of the Opera figure shrouded by a cowl struck up a funereal tune on a church organ.
Hamed strutted among the graves, pausing to knock over a skull balanced on top of a headstone before smirking into the camera.
Boxing and death, inextricably linked in one shot.
Hey, guys! That's a neat idea!
Sky's Ian Darke was so disturbed that he abandoned the commentator's almost obligatory role of cheerleader for any sporting event which Sky have bought and posed the question: 'Harmless Halloween fun? Or in very poor taste in a dangerous sport like boxing?
'I'm certainly of the latter view myself.'
Viewers who sat up for the whole night saw someone else who would certainly have agreed - Liverpool's Richie Wenton, who has to live with the death of Bradley Stone for ever on his mind. Still, it could have been worse. Hamed's camp apparently vetoed the clever TV boys' original plan, which was to have the names of his previous victims inscribed on the gravestones.
That was the only smart PR move the 'Prince' made from the moment he stepped off Concorde.
The crowd, swelled by a huge contingent of Irish-Americans rooting for the 'Pocket Rocket' from Belfast's Shankhill Road, took against Hamed in round one when he retreated around the ring, swaying, waving his arms about, leering and grinning as if he was in a pop video.
When the third round came and went without the predicted demolition of McCullough - let alone the 'serious damage' which Hamed nastily promised to inflict -- the boos, jeers and whistles reached a crescendo.
'A terrific fighter,' said Darke's ringside summariser Glenn McCrory, adding wryly. 'But he hasn't quite won over the American public yet.'
Nor has Saddam Hussein.
Thanks to the boundless generosity of Sky, I watched for free.
It would have cost me 47p per minute.
But for the pleasure of seeing the smirk wiped off Hamed's face and McCullough being carried shoulder-high around the ring and cheered to the rafters, it would have been a small price to pay.
qA LARGE chunk of last Saturday's Grandstand was given over to the semi-finals of the indoor bowls championships from Potter's Leisure Resort, Great Yarmouth.
Thrilling stuff, guaranteed to get your pulse ambling.
There are only two reasons why the BBC don't emulate Sky Sports and screen what most viewers want throughout the afternoon - regular reports from Premiership and Nationwide League games from up and down the country.
1. They can't afford it.
2. They can't be bothered.
Answers on a postcard.
SPITTING IMAGE
Dear Charlie:
VILLA new boy Dion 'You Sexy Thing' Dublin is a dead ringer for Erroll Brown of Hot Chocolate. I don't know if Dion can sing, but I saw him playing the saxophone on Ian Wright's TV show last year and he certainly hit all the right notes. Elaine Jackson. Leamington, Warwickshire.
Charlie: Dion hasn't always been on song. I asked a friend who saw his debut for Cambridge United to sum up his performance, and he said: 'It started with a miss.'
Sue's boys
are so
slick
A QUESTION Of Sport returned this week (Wednesday BBC1), looking so groovy, naughty and downright disres-pectful.
It made the old David Coleman-Ian Botham-Bill Beaumont show of fond memory seem as staid and strait-laced as The Brains Trust.
Team captains Ally McCoist and John Parrott have settled down into a terrific partnership, intuitively tuned to each other's wavelengths and each constantly striving to have the last word.
Referee Sue Barker, sleeker, saucier and blonder than ever, plays the New Ladette role so convincingly that I wouldn't be surprised to learn that she kept a six-pack of Special Brew under her desk.
One of the questions wouldn't have been out of place on They Think It's All Over.
`Richard Raskin played in the men's singles at the 1960 US Open tennis championships. Renee Richards reached the finals of the ladies doubles at the 1977 tournament.
What do they have in common?'
'They're the same person! Richard became Renee in 1976!' shrieked Sue. She added: 'And I was in the shower with him ...her, I mean! But that's a story for another time!'
As David Coleman would say: 'Errr, quite remarkable!'
